Kipper Hood part 7 - Archery Tournament
trumpeting *Baron Greenback: snickering Stiletto, this is a red-letter day. A coup d'at, to coin a Norman phrase. *Stiletto: Oh, yes, indeed, sire. *Baron Greenback: Your plan to capture Kipper Hood in public is sheer genius. chuckling Spoons, no one sits higher than the king. Must I remind you, Stiletto? tongue *Stiletto: Oh, oh, forgive me, sire. stuttering I didn't mean to... *Baron Greenback: My trap is baited and set... ...and then revenge! Ah, revenge! *Stiletto: Shh! Not so loud, sire. Remember, only you and I know, and your secret is my secret. *Baron Greenback: Stop! giggles Stop hissing in my ear. Secret? What secret? *Stiletto: Why, the capture of Kipper Hood, sire. *Baron Greenback: That insolent blackguard. Ooh! I'll show him who wears the crown! *Stiletto: I share your loathing, sire. That scurrilous scoundrel who fooled you with that silly disguise, who dared to rob you and made you look utterly ridiculous... *Baron Greenback: Enough! Stiletto, you deliberately dodged. *Stiletto: But... But... Sire, please. *Baron Greenback: Stop sniveling and hold still. *Stiletto: Thank you, sire. *Sue Ellen Armstrong: Oh, Dee Dee, I'm so excited. But how will I recognize him? *Dee Dee: Oh, he'll let you know somehow. That young rogue of yours is full of surprises, my dear. *Kipper: There she is, Shaggy. Isn't she beautiful? *Shaggy Rogers: Cool it, lover boy. Your heart's runnin' away with your head. *G9: Oh, stop worrying. This disguise would fool my own mother. *Shaggy Rogers: chuckling Yeah, but your mom ain't here. You gotta fool old bushel britches. *G9: Lightning, Your Honor? *Lightning: Yeah. *G9: Meetin' ya face-to-face is a real treat. A real treat. *Lightning: Well, now, thank you. chuckling Oh, excuse me. I gotta go win this tournament. *Shaggy Rogers: Hey, old Kipper's not a bad actor. But wait till he sees this scene I lay on Prince Greenback. Ah! Me lord. My esteemed royal sovereign of the realm. The head man himself. You're beautiful. *Baron Greenback: laughs He has style, eh, Stiletto? French *Shaggy Rogers: laughing You took the words right out of my mouth, BG. *Baron Greenback: "BG"! I like that. Do you know I do? Stiletto, put it on my luggage. BG. guffawing BG. Yes. *Stiletto: Hmph! And you? Who might you be, sir? *Shaggy Rogers: I am Sir Rogg, king of Chutney. And don't stick your tongue out at me, kid. And now, Your Mightiness, allow me to lay some protocol on you. *Baron Greenback: Oh, no. Uh, forgive me, but I lose more jewels that way than... Please sit down. *Shaggy Rogers: Thanks, BG. Couldn't get a better seat than this, could you? The royal box. Oh! Hey! Hey, wait a minute! What's... Oh, excuse me, buster. *Stiletto: "Buster"? You, sir, have taken my seat. *Baron Greenback: Stiletto, with you around, who needs a court jester? continues laughing Now get out there and keep your snake eyes open for you know who. *Stiletto: You... You mean, I... I'm being dismissed? *Shaggy Rogers: You heard His Mightiness. Move it, creepy. Get lost. Begone, long one. *Stiletto: What cheek! "Creepy"? "Buster"? "Long one"? Who does that dopey duke think he is? *SpongeBob SquarePants: Now, he's up to somethin', Danger Mouse. *Danger Mouse: Yeah. Come on! *G9: Ah, Your Ladyship. Beggin' your pardon, but it's a great honor to be shootin' for the favor of a lovely lady like yourself. I hopes I win the kiss. *Sue Ellen Armstrong: Oh! Well, thank you, my thin-legged archer. giggling I wish you luck... whispering with all my heart. *Stiletto: echoing Hmm... I wonder. *Doctor Claw: Your Highness, with your royal permission, we are ready to begin. *Baron Greenback: Proceed, captain! *Doctor Claw: The tournament of the golden arrow will now begin. *cheers *trumpeting *drumroll *cheers *whistles *Jimmy: Yay, Percy! *boos *cheers *Baron Greenback: A perfect bull's-eye. Well, well. *Shaggy Rogers: That's what you call pullin' it back and lettin' it go, BG. *G9: I'm gonna win that golden bullet, and then I'm gonna present meself to the lovely Sue Ellen and... *Lightning: Listen, scissorbill, if you shoot half as good as you blabbermouth, you're better'n Kipper Hood. *Thomas: Kipper Hood, he says! Wowee! I'm tiptop, all right, but I'm not as good as he is. *crowd cheers *Shaggy Rogers: That kid's got class. Ain't he, BG? *Baron Greenback: Indeed he has, Shaggy. (chuckles) Bravo! Uh, bravo! Yes. *G9: Oh, um, by the way. I hear you're havin' a bit of trouble gettin' your hands on that Kipper Hood. *Lightning: He's scared of me, that's what he is. You notice he didn't show up here today. Huh! I could spot him through them phony disguises. *Stiletto: (echoing) It's him! It's Kipper Hood! I just can't wait till I tell the Majesty. (chuckling) *SpongeBob SquarePants (dubbing Jack Skellington's voice): I am the Pumpkin King, Ha ha ha ha! *Stiletto (dubbing Maurice LaMarche's voice): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! (then dubbing Sir Hiss' voice) Unhand me, you... (grunts) Please, please! I don't drink! (sloshing) *Doctor Claw: Attention, everyone. The final contestants are... Sheriff of Lightning... boos ...and the red-headed settler from Devonshire. (crowd cheers) *Baron Greenback: My dear, I suspect you favor the gangly youth, hmm? *Sue Ellen Armstrong: Uh, why, yes, Greenback. Well, at least he amuses me. *Baron Greenback: (laughs) Coincidently, my dear young lady, he amuses me too. *Doctor Claw: For the final shootout, move the target back three paces. *Lightning: You heard him, Eddy! Get goin'! Move it, you birdbrain. And remember what you're supposed to do. *Hummus: Yes, sir, Lightning, sir. *crowd boos. *Lightning: Well, that shot wins the golden bullet, the kiss and the whole caboodle. *crowd gasps *crowd cheers *Danger Mouse: Yay! He did it, he did it, he did it! *Doctor Claw whispers. Category:Louis Walkden's Transcripts Category:Robin Hood Parts